Red River sunset 2016
In that dimly lit room two thousand years ago,
The terror was real.
I picture a small, shuttered space, claustrophobic as they huddle together, hiding in fear of discovery. Their dreams and lives are in shambles— they fear they are now “criminals” without a cause.
Whispers, numb silence,
Tears of grief flow unchecked.
Confusion gives way to bursts of raw anger.
And the spiral spins down, down, down into guilt, doubt and despair.
What if it was all a lie?
What if the last three years of trials and triumphs had been for nothing?
What if they now had to return defeatedly home to the only life they had previously known?
The fearful and uncertain time of the “in between” can be terrifying.
The gap between what you thought your life, your church, your family would be, and the events unrolling before your eyes can be disheartening and downright depressing.
The need gaping deep,
The yearning for what is not,
The broken hearts,
The broken spirit,
The fractured dreams,
All roll into a quicksand of an uncertain future in a different colored paint.
I may not have answers,
I may not have understanding that satisfies,
I may not always have the courage I need,
But these things I know:
He loves me,
Fiercely, protectively, infinitely. John 3:16
He guides me,
In the storms, over the mountains, through the valleys. Psalm 23:4
He is faithful,
He will never leave me or forsake me. Deut 31:8
In that cruel room centuries ago, the fear and despair was palatable.
But I have what they did not—
The promises in my hand, the sobering realities and the happy endings to read daily, which encourage me to keep the faith.
The power of his words to soothe my soul will never diminish.
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever. Psalms 23
-When fears assail, and the light dims, find comfort in his word and the knowledge that your prayers are heard.